Narcissistic Abuse Recovery
One of the most disorienting parts of recovering from a relationship with a narcissist is the way it makes you question your own reality. The gaslighting, the hot and cold, the moments of connection followed by cruelty, over time, these patterns erode your sense of self in ways that are genuinely hard to explain to people who haven't experienced it.
You might find yourself defending someone who hurt you. Wondering if it was actually that bad. Missing the person who also caused you tremendous pain. Feeling like you'll never trust your own judgment again.
This is what narcissistic abuse does. It's not a character flaw. It's a predictable response to a specific kind of psychological manipulation.
What Recovery Actually Looks Like
Healing from narcissistic abuse isn't just about understanding what happened, though that matters. It's about rebuilding the things that were slowly dismantled: your self-trust, your sense of reality, your ability to identify what you need and believe you deserve it.
In our work together, we use a combination of trauma-informed care and DBT to help you regulate the intense emotions that come with this kind of healing, rebuild your identity outside of the relationship, set real limits with the people in your life going forward, and learn to trust yourself again.
This Is For You If:
-
You've left a toxic relationship but can't stop thinking about it
-
You feel confused, foggy, or like you don't know what's real anymore
-
You made excuses for someone's behavior for longer than you want to admit
-
You feel responsible for another person's emotions and moods
-
Your self-esteem has been significantly damaged
-
You want to make sure you never end up in this dynamic again
When You're Co-Parenting With the Person You're Recovering From:
This deserves its own conversation, because it's one of the most complicated situations a person can be in. You've recognized the dynamic. You're doing the work. And yet you still have to text them about pickup times.
Co-parenting with a narcissistic or emotionally manipulative ex doesn't end when the relationship does, in some ways it intensifies, because now there are custody arrangements, school events, and children watching how you both handle it. The gaslighting can continue through parenting decisions. The power struggles don't disappear. And you're supposed to stay regulated through all of it for the sake of your kids.
This is something I work with directly. We focus on protecting your emotional limits within the co-parenting relationship, building communication strategies that reduce contact and conflict, and developing the steady, grounded presence your children need from you, even when the other parent is doing everything they can to destabilize it. Click here to learn more...
I work with adults and am proudly LGBTQIA+ affirming. Sessions in person in Montclair, NJ and via telehealth across NJ & NY.
Serving Montclair, Bloomfield, Glen Ridge, Verona, West Orange, Maplewood, South Orange and across Essex County NJ.